Filmsane

I’m not a big spoiler girl. Especially film spoilers. Book, TV spoilers never affected my perception, likability or even general opinion (before), but for the first time ever… this past week…. Ive had a huge film spoiler regret. Let me explain.

Avengers Infinity War opened this week in the theaters. Some of my colleagues went and saw it, and I’m about to go and see the movie in just a matter of hours. I had some previous obligations that prevented me from going to the movie theater, so basically i had to wait for the weekend and actually see it, but that time has come.

However, my friend and colleague bombarded me with spoilers on Thursday morning. She and her boyfriend went to see Infinity War at the pre-premiere on Wednesday and she was basically sharing the death count on Thursday morning. At 8 o’ clock AM sharp. Thanks Alex!

And like I said. I never had problems with them before. I’ve even shared them un-intentionally in my reviews, but for the first time they affected me. They crushed my soul. Yes, you’ve guessed it… I’ve learned that my favorite super-hero is about to die, and I’ve been in pain these past days because of it. I never thought I’d be affected by it, let alone devastated, but here i am… Wining like a little baby about it.

And I’ve not yet seen the movie for Christ sake!

As the hours and minutes to the screening of the movie are getting closer, I’m starting to get anxious, and this is my version of hell to be honest. And not to be dramatic and everything but I think I’m in the third stage of Kübler-Ross model.

I’m way past shock and denial. And in the anger stage of my grief and it’s just getting bigger and bigger as the time is passing by. For the first time I have anger issues and huge amount of regret about hearing the spoilers, and I’m finding myself choked up by the deaths of the movie characters. Why? The logical side of me is trying to reason with my feelings. They are not your friends, or family. They are just fictional characters that you periodically see at the movies. That’s all.

But the thing is, they are my friends. I’ve shared my happy memories with them in the past decade. The MCU made us friends and now I’m mourning the loss of one of my friends. Has any of you self this way too? I know it’s silly and stupid, since I’m 31 years old grown as woman, but the spoiler regret is real and it’s agonizing. Help!

More posts will follow after I see Avengers Infinity War. Stay tuned!